… is to let him undress. Surely you’ve noticed that your kid agrees with me.

I’ll admit (because he won’t) that undressing seems to undo the point of getting dressed in the first place.

But your toddler isn’t confused at all. From his point of view, getting undressed always follows getting dressed.  I know you think the day should elapse before changing outfits, but he thinks an hour is long enough.

Your toddler is at a confusing crossroads.

He’s finally good at walking (but you keep trying to stop him), he’s talking (but the big people act like they don’t understand what he’s trying to say), he can eat alone (if somebody would just let him pick out the green things), and he remembers where you hid his best toys (you call them Hummel figurines, or some such thing).

Your baby is in cahoots with Mother Nature.

Together, they lure you (and any other helpless adult) into feeding, touching, talking to, listening to, and bonding with the newborn members of our species. About twelve inches from target is the best distance for a newborn’s built-in binoculars to see most clearly.

You play into their hands every time you position the highly-favored roundness of your face and your eyes’ rounded irises approximately that distance from your baby’s face — an inevitable consequence of breastfeeding.

Your new infant also appreciates the easy-to-see contrast between light and dark.  That’s why you’ll notice his gaze fixed on your hairline, your eyebrows, and even your moving mouth — you are talking to him during feedings, right?

When you respond to your crying baby, your crying baby learns that:

1. It works to use his words (yes, for now, those are his words),
2. His needs are valid (worth speaking up about),
3. You can be trusted, and
4. You are source of comfort in the midst of overwhelm.

Be careful with this process, parents.  You would not want baby to get the wrong impression.  If you don’t pick him up because you think that a young baby can be spoiled, you’re mistaken.  Spoiling and manipulation require a level of brain development and multitasking that your new baby simply does not possess.  Yet.