Parenting As A Second Language
You know that hinky feeling your Aunt Edna gets in her belly when bad news is a comin’?
That used be called “Mother -wit.” Now it’s called psychosomatic.
It’s a rare instinct that hasn’t been dulled by disrespect, replaced by reference libraries, or made out to be too primitive for these technology-based times.
The way that parents (most adults actually, in every studied culture, the world over) automatically talk when they’re talking to babies is an anthropological victory. In the baby biz, we call that special language “Parentese.”
As an attuned parent, you are learning your infant’s rhythms, preferences, and habits, so of course you’re learning your family’s new language. But surely you’ve also witnessed something like this:
While mother shops, a young baby sits contentedly in her stroller, minding her own business, conducting a taste test on her toes. A middle-aged stranger strolls by, glimpses baby’s fresh face, perfect contentment, perfectly cute outfit, and becomes enchanted by all that happiness and all those pastels.
Within seconds, the grumpy lady who hasn’t faked niceness to her own neighbors since the last hurricane warning is overtaken by her instinct to communicate with a baby. And of course, to be answered back. A smile, a giggle, a wiggle — even a brief glance will do. To ensure her chances of success, the lady formerly known as grumpy will:
- Slow down her rate of speech.
- Open her mouth wider (this exaggeration draws baby’s eyes to the source of the sound).
- Widen her eyes.
- Over-pronounce words, putting longer pauses between them.
- Speak in a higher pitch than she uses with non-babies.
- Say very simple sentences.
- Say very short sentences.
- Talk about current events (“What a pretty hat!” or “Yummy toes! Yes, yummy toes!”)
- Smile more.
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Carly Jennings | Parenting Skills | 
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